Your Permission to be Uncool

I’m headed to surf camp next month…and feeling like a big chicken. I’ve surfed only a few times and my performance consistently underwhelms. I have a new wetsuit, a beautiful board — and some dreams. I dream of having a good time, doing well and returning home a capable surfer.

To guarantee that my dreams come true, I’m taking surf lessons in advance. If you clean before the housekeeper arrives, you know what I’m talking about.

I’m putting pressure on myself to do well and it’s NOT relaxing or fun — so I’ve decided to follow the advice of Brené Brown, author of Daring Greatly, and give myself permission to be uncool.

I plan to dare badly, terribly, dreadfully and often. I’ll let it all hang out…and I’ll probably suck.

Daring GreatlyIn Daring Greatly, Brené shares research on the relationship between vulnerability and courage. Vulnerability is that crappy feeling you get when exposing fears or taking emotional risks. Wow…tricky + dicey + awkward. When I’m feeling vulnerable, I might try to control the situation, back out or decide that I don’t care. And then I watch my dreams evaporate.

There’s an antidote for this, but it’s not easy to swallow. To transform the crappy feelings into courage, we can make the choice to simply be there — in that uncomfortable tangle of uncertainty and risk. If we are willing to be vulnerable, we’ll have ‘experiences that bring purpose and meaning to our lives’. The bottom line? There is no courage without vulnerability. See if you can lean into the discomfort and ambiguity. Flirt with disaster. Be uncool. Dare not so greatly — and see what happens.

I truly believe that anything worth doing is worth doing badly 
so ask yourself, how does it feel to NOT do the thing you want to do?

“The willingness to show up changes us. It makes us
a little braver each time. ” – Brené Brown
“I dare you.” – Wendy Kranz


If you’d like a sip more, check out: Ready for a vulnerability hangover? Five ideas from Brené Brown.

Watch Brené Brown’s TED Talk: The Power of Vulnerability. She’s funny.


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